Inner Voices

character_head @ 2004-12-20T10:28:00

2004-12-20T15:27:06Z

"I've spent far too much time dreaming about doing something worthwhile. Seriously - fuck it. If I'd spent half my time doing something about the worthwhile thing, whatever it is, I'd have ended up being the king or something.

"Dude. Another hit. You're talkin' out yer ass again, and I'm not in the mood."

Imagine...

2004-12-07T15:09:19Z

"I once thought that I wasn't supposed to fall in love."

"No kidding?" I looked at the old man curiously - I had to. To hear him say that was akin to hearing your parents say you were the kid they tried to abort with a coat hangar.

"Yeah. It took years before I found someone I really could love. Sure, I had flings - but that's what they were, flings. Nothing more. I kept hoping, but they never really turned out to be anything beyond some meaningless sex and great conversation. If... sex can ever be called meaningless, that is."

"So all those girlfriends...?"

"Just girlfriends. I didn't meet Marcy until I was almost too old to do anything about it. It hit like thunderbolt, though. I saw her and I knew.. I just didn't know what I knew until she'd already told me off a couple of times for being an asshole."

"No way."

"Of course 'way'. You never know that you're in love until it threatens to leave you. Love is tempered in adversity, and really becomes love only in the moment when you have to lay yourself on the line to keep it. Shiny and happy's all right for storybooks, but the real world is a bit more biting, and infinitely more rewarding. Hell, son - Hollywood isn't filled with people notorious for maintaining a relationship. What do they know about love?"

"I wasn't talking about movies. I was talking about you and Marcy."

"Doesn't matter. You're too young and stupid to realize that real life isn't a hollywood set. You'll figure it out one day - until then, don't lump your ideas of love on a guy who knows better."

A Monologue:

2004-11-17T14:52:33Z

"You teenagers think your problems are somehow unique. They're not.

"Oh, don't give me that look. Listen, kid - you can think you're some sort of amazingly special person that nobody can understand all you want. I'm not saying your problems aren't real, but they certainly are only important in the little world you can see, and they sure as hell aren't different than anybody else's at your age. I can sum 'em up for you in a couple of questions, and you ain't even told me what they are yet. 'Do other people like me?' 'Why is whoever so mean?' 'Why don't I fit in?'

"Yeah, yeah- that's not all of 'em, but that's most of 'em. No offense, kid - but do you honestly think that people.. .real people.. are going to care about what clothes you're wearing? Christ, kid - get over it. You need to recognize what that school you're in really is - it's a collection of insecure people all trying to come out 'on top' because they feel like that's going to make 'em important, and let 'em feel a bit better.

"Teenagers are cruel because they're all playing an elaborate game that involves not looking too closely at themselves. The minute they do, they think, they're afraid they won't like what they see. You're just caught up in it yourself. The only way you're going to get a leg up on all those people who are - yes are - persecuting you is to figure out why they're doing it and realize it's all about them. Make people smaller so you feel bigger - you know the drill. In the middle of doing that, maybe you won't do it to other people.

"See, you can't know anybody else until you figure out yourself. That's really what this 'growing up' thing is. Why don't you start there instead of whining about it to me?"

A Conversation between Two Brothers:

2004-11-16T19:43:10Z

"So, you honestly believe that the secret of life is beer?"

"Yup. There is no more perfect beverage ever created by man or god. I daresay that if you actually travelled into the mythical realm of Zeus and his cronies, you'd find the Ambrosia they served on the slopes of Mount Olympus was nothing more than a nice Guiness bitter served warm by an Irishman named Malloy."

"By an Irishman, no less?"

"Of course. It takes an Irishman to respect beer enough to pour it the way it deserves to be poured."

"That's a bit racist."

"Only if you've never drunk beer poured by an Irishman."

"Okay, okay - so let's skip it. What's the secret of life in beer, then?"

"What, you mean you don't know?"

"Humor me."

"Fine. It gets poured for you - a standard measure. It may get poured well or poorly - maybe you'll have a big head and a lot of foam, but only a little substance. Maybe it's all beer, but without anything that makes drinking it interesting - it's gone flat. Who knows? Thing is - you get your beer and you pay for it just like everybody else. You even get it in the same size glass."

"Right.. I'm with you so far."

"Thing is, your beer isn't going to be just like anybody elses. Some are black, some are golden. Some are flavoured with raspberries for chrissake. Some are twenty bucks a glass, and some are only found on nickel beer night. Some people are going to look at your beer and laugh, and others are going to envy your beer. Doesn't matter, though - it's your beer. You picked it out, and you get to drink it."

"Hmmmm..."

"Bear with me. Thing is - you're going to drink that beer, and hopefully you're going to enjoy it. Some folks try some beer they don't like, and end up pouring it out before they're done - other people go for the last couple of drops you can never get out of the glass. Some people just drink half and let the rest warm up .. or cool down, depending. In the end, though - you finish your beer. Then you're going to piss it out. It's what you do with your beer that counts."

"Riiiight. And you figured all of this out.. when?"

"I was drunk at the time."

"Makes sense."